Be Cool

Remember in Pulp Fiction when Jules and Vincent interfere with the diner robbery?

A few moments stick out from that scene, but the one that always got me was when Jules calmed everybody down. He maintained control of the situation, addressed everyone who needed to be addressed, and said, “Bitch, be cool.” That’s something that’s missing from a lot of bar interactions.

Think about it. Hysterics, theatrics, and flip outs all make for entertaining movies or reality TV. When Punkin spit on New York in Flavor of Love, that was insane. When Hulk and Iron Man have their throw-down in Age of Ultron because the big guy doesn’t realize how low the sun is getting, that’s a super cool fight scene. But in real life? No situation is ever improved by losing your cool.

Seriously, has yelling or screaming at someone ever solved a problem? Sure, it might make you feel better in the moment, but it’s not actually going to make the problem go away. In a few (rare) instances, you might get what you want in the short term just because it will make you go away faster, but it’s not actually solving your problem. As a bartender and bar manager, I’ve taken drinks off of someone’s tab because they were screaming about not ordering them. But I also banned that guy from the bar after that. He was making a scene, and taking the shots off his tab was the way to make him stop doing that. Problem solved. But not getting to come back to the bar is a much bigger problem than the one you just solved.

I know that when you’re drinking, emotions can run high. And when something seems wrong, it can be really easy to lose your temper and flip out. But you’ve gotta rein that in, and keep your cool. Designated drivers, keep an eye on your friends. If you have a higher tolerance than your friends, step in and handle the situation before it escalates. Flipping out only makes things worse, so take steps to prevent it.

This month was short and to the point, because if I kept going I would just be repeating myself and giving more examples, and that would get boring for everyone. This week’s drink is likely to create scenarios where the blog gets completely ignored. The Liquid Cocaine shot tastes disgusting, but it’ll definitely get you drunk. I once described it as tasting “like toothpaste and sadness,” and I stand by that description. It doesn’t taste good, but it does the trick, so enjoy!

• Combine .5 oz Goldschlager, .5 oz Jagermeister, and .5 oz Rumpleminze in a shaker with ice, shake until chilled
• Strain into a shot glass
• Don’t look at it or smell it, just shoot